Hi again, sorry its taken me such an enormous amount of time to catch up; but a lot has happened this past year.
So here I am again, getting ready to start with this not so new but interesting topic; Dating as a Boomer. Our ideas of dating have changed over the years; we're no longer looking to play the field, but centered on having an enjoyable conversation on any topic.
Those like me, mid 40's, we have different priorities, either wanting to blend families or start a new one. We're no longer Patricia, or Scott, or Lisa or Harry; we're now someone's soccer parents, and we spend our time walking our kids dogs, juggling homework & after school activities, and lets not forget work and home responsibilities.
What we used to find so irresistible, no longer holds true in most cases. Lets start by defining who we are. For the most part we are middle class, with strong values and character. We no longer take things for granted, in other words we've grown and matured. Our kids ages range from 5 to 15 on average (plus have their own personalities). In some cases there is a non active second parent - which makes the famous "my time" virtually non-existent.
We all want peace and harmony at all levels. Of course this is probably easier said than done. Most boomers are divorced which in itself comes with a few scars and tears. We wish for caring, warm, loving, family oriented (especially if we have kids), supportive, and stable partners. As women we dream of being romanced and dancing under the stars or drinking coffee together and holding hands.
Now I don't have the solution nor the answers; but if we take a step back we'll realize that men and women have similar out looks when it comes to boomer dating; and this might make it easier to find the right one for you.
Be true to yourself and comfortable with who you are. You are independent, interesting and engaging. Do you want someone that is needy and dependent on you all the time? Don't you have enough with your kids or pets? You can only give what you have inside, hence you can only receive what you're giving.
Look to see the negative traits that your past relationships had . This might help figure out what's not working for you and why these aren't going forward. There are a lot of companies out there that for several hundreds if not thousands of dollars will tell you what wrong with you and tell you how to fix it. Do you really need a stranger to do that? Ok, well, maybe some of us do; but for those of us that don't, do it the old fashion way pull out paper & pencil and start writing your list.
So as dating boomer where do you go so not to fall into the serial dating trap? If you've come to a point were you're tired of either going solo, dreading blind dates or paying dating site to not meet anyone; then try something new.
There's a web site called MeetUp.com I'm not advocating that this is the answer for the Boomer dating prayers; but after going through it I realized that there are several groups, that cater to parents just like us and our kids can take part of a couple of the activities.
All you do is type the activity or social group you're interested in, then put in your zip code, hit enter and you're good to go. There are several groups you can choose from.
The most important thing for you to remember, is that its up to you. If you're not happy no one can give you happiness.
Good night :)
